Friday, August 13, 2010

It's True! It's True!

IT'S SO HOT THAT

....the birds have to use potholders to pull the worms out of the ground.
....the trees are whistling for the dogs.
....the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
....hot water comes from both taps.
....you can make sun tea instantly.
....you learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron.
....the temperature drops below 95 F (35 C) and you feel a little chilly.
....you discover that in July it only takes two fingers to steer your car.
....you discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.
....you actually burn your hand opening the car door.
....you break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 A.M.
....your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and
end up lying on the pavement and cook to death"?
....you realize that asphalt has a liquid stage.
....the potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add butter.
....the cows are giving evaporated milk.
....farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying boiled eggs

5 comments:

the dogs' mother said...

>>....hot water comes from both taps.<<

that actually happened with our house before we put on new siding!

Bob said...

Yup, Joy, it's been a scorching week in Smallville, but we had some rain tonight so now it's mid-70s.
Where are my mittens?

Mistress Maddie said...

We have had a three day release of the heat, but it comes back this week. LOL,LOL, I just love the list. And I'll be thinking of you later today as we leave the beach and head to a gay campground for a toga party-most guy don't wear anything under there togas!!!!!!!! I think it's the heat? I think it's the gin!!!!

Unknown said...

Looking at the weather map for the whole country, Maine seems to be the place to be. We have had so many bad summers in a row that this year makes the oldtimer remember their childhoods. It never was this good, ever ever as it is right now in Maine.

Miss Ginger Grant said...

Miss Ginger's kitchen sink is on the west wall of her kitchen. In the summer, when the sun beats down on that west wall, she has to run the cold water for several minutes to get all the hot water out of the line to wash her hands. It's scalding hot otherwise. She is not exaggerating!