The Actor

This interview with Mickey Rourke on The Charlie Rose Show blew me away. It's insightful and inspiring in its own way. He's a good actor, but I never liked him and can understand now what it was that turned me off. He explains how devastating his divorce was for him and how he messed up his acting career and life. He was washed up as a boxer and lived in a dump. Mickey Rourke said although his life was hopeless, he still had hope. Unlike the main character in The Wrestler, he could change and did. After years of therapy, he said he worked hard and had learned the tools now that he didn't have back then. He fully accepts messing things up professionally and personally mostly because of his attitude which was made worse by the drugs and alcohol. I'm not defending him but just reporting what an outstanding performance he gave and how much I enjoyed this interview. I wouldn't want to spend time with him. Those complicated, screwed-up bad boys aren't for me.

If you have time to watch it, you'll see what I mean.

It gave me quite a bit to think about. This winter has been hard for me for some reason and definitely a winter of my discontent. It's difficult to describe right now, but I am ready for a change. It just feels too overwhelming.

David said something in a comment that I understand all too well. When I tell people I want to lose weight, feel better, get my house organized, and enjoy my life, it's not that I don't know how to do all of that. Hell, I could write books about it and conduct seminars! I KNOW what to do. That's not the problem, not at all. It's just doing it. I also know what that takes - doing it a step at a time until I feel better doing it and make it a habit. Concern, help, support, and encouragement help for sure, and I appreciate that tremendously. Without Sally, 2/7 of my house would still be in chaos. Knowing something intellectually and actually making a commitment to make changes aren't the same thing. So no matter how much well-meaning friends and family give us advice we already know, ultimately we have to make that decision and choice ourselves and overcome our weapons of self-destruction. (I got that term from Robin Williams, who should know.)